I have a dog, and am well aware of owners’ responsibility to clean up after their canines, as well as just how easy it is. While initially rather sickening to me, over the past year I have found scooping to be a bit of an art, especially managing to keep hands clean in the process. I can imagine it’s how mothers become after changing dozens of diapers in all manner of consistencies for months on end. I’ve even been known to give “baggie” lessons to neighbours and consider myself a pro of sorts in the poop-scoop department.

It’s understandable and perhaps even forgivable to occasionally be caught by surprise when puppy drops an unexpected package on the lawn (I now stow bags in every jacket, just in case), but it’s clear many are just dogging their responsibility and tossing their neighbours and fellow owners’ walking comfort to the wind.

There’s really no excuse. Not only are there myriad scooping gadgets on the market (the hand in the bag to grab, invert, tie and toss still works best), but it’s also the law to pick up after Puddles in our city, so the same rules should, and most times do, apply on condo common areas. (Failing to do so in public spaces of Calgary can fetch a hefty $250 fine). And for the earthy dog lover, there are biodegradable baggies available, so they can stoop and scoop with their conscience in check.

To my delight, my research uncovered several companies, including at least a couple in Calgary who have made number two their first priority for a fee—with service by the week or even bi-weekly for the especially poo-phobic. And for a fairly modest sum, I might add, considering what’s involved—ranging from $10 a week to clean up a week’s worth of waste to around $20 for households with two or more pooches adding to the pile. One even has printable “poupons” offering a deal on its unique service. Some of the more imaginative monikers for folks making doggie business their own include Scoopy Doo, Watch Your Step, and my personal favourite, held by some entrepreneurs unafraid to roll up their sleeves for a living in Virginia—Doody Calls.

Whatever you call it, for some reason this year’s winter chill seems to have brought out more offenders on the common areas around my condo. And I don’t blame the four-legged set, who are really just doing what comes naturally. Maybe we were just oblivious last year since we only became pet owners when the cold weather was in full force, and delinquent dog walkers had already swept their dogs’ dirty work under the snow for months by the time we’d hit the—er, brown strip.

As both a condo and pet owner I find those who refuse to pick up after Scooby doos, around a home I try to take pride in, lazy and inconsiderate. If they don’t want to clean up after their own dogs, how do they think other people, especially those not-so-fond of the four-legged, feel? I have personally carted off bags of deposits left by pooches other than my own, but don’t want to make it a habit. Being neighbourly is one thing, but there’s only so much one can take.

My pet peeve is not just with the smell—especially after a Chinook blows through the city and melts the snow—or even the inconvenience of having to clean off my footwear or my dog’s paws. Dog waste not only carries bacteria, parasites, and diseases that could take my beloved best pal away from us, but it can get carried into sewers and stormwater drains and contaminate human water supplies, or be transmitted to humans in the form of Salmonella, E-coli and Giardia.

Luckily as a director on my condominium board, I have more of a leg to stand on than most, and might even toss the notion of fining offenders to see if it gets any bites by fellow board members at the next meeting. We would certainly be within our rights to do so, but you would pretty well have to catch a per-poo-trator in the act and likely even back it up with photo evidence. And in a condo complex of 141 units, it’s hard to match faces and feces with addresses. It is listed in the bylaws, and I have seen at least one sign around the grounds warning owners to pick up after pets, but apparently there are many who either can’t read or think the rules don’t apply.

If the problem persists, we may, as a board, have to elicit the ex-poo-tise of one of the pros in the business of doggie business. Perhaps they can cut us a discount for buying the service in bulk.

Or I could start leaving bags on people’s stoops with an invoice attached.

One thing’s for sure, if the situation doesn’t soon start to improve around the common areas, someone’s going to have to cause a stink.  CL